Dare I open myself to faith?

I’m having a hard time moving today. My puppy and I are on the couch, curled around each other protectively. I’m waiting to hear what the State’s Attorney (SA) has to say about my case. If I have a case, that is.

Trooper, that darling man, that consummate professional, emailed me this morning to FYI me that he left a message with the SA and is waiting for a call back. That simple courtesy is so wildly comforting. He kept his promise.

It’s an awful feeling to be let down by law enforcement officials. I am in the midst of grappling with the massive understanding that I am a victim.  It is a raw, vulnerable position. Officer G- violated me almost as much as my stalker. His lack of action last year was almost as exploitative as when my stalker posted the nude pictures of me. Both men took advantage of my vulnerability and their power.

Shortly I’ll push myself into the shower and make a list of goals to accomplish today.

And I’ll wait. And let wisps of faith move me.

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